Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Arlen Specter



(Deep, booming voice of God)

Attention Republicans: Some things have come to My attention that we need to discuss. Though I am a vengeful God who demands absolute loyalty, perhaps it wasn't such a hot idea to chase a moderate like Arlen Specter out of the party of Me. You hounded and threatened him and called him a Democrat and, guess what, he decided he may as well be a Democrat. Nice going, fellas.
You just handed this Obama character a filibuster-proof majority in the Senate. I don't know if you even want to bother showing up for work for the next couple of years. That is all.

(Pause)

Okay, I was just told that they don't have the 60 seats yet. They still have to seat Al Franken. Maybe God jumped the gun a little on that. Let's not make a big deal out of it. And please don't make Me bring up Al Franken ever again. I can't stand that little troll. I let him coast as an unfunny SNL writer for about 20 seasons and this is how he repays Me.

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